This blog is inspired by the teaching in this FB video blog.
You can watch it here below:
For me, to live an awakened life requires a constant vigilance of the inner workings of our psyche. It requires a deep commitment to a moment-by-moment awareness of our inner emotional tapestry. When we are aware of what is happening on the inside, we become aware of how we create the energy of things on the outside.
Of course, this constant vigilance requires quite a lot of work on our part doesn’t it? We cannot simply “fall asleep” so to speak. To live an awakened life means to commit to constantly look within all the while living in this material world.
The manner in which we balance the spiritual and physical is the art of living.
Some of us are better at living the physical, and some of us are better at living the metaphysical, the spiritual, and I believe we attract just the right people to make us whole, so I know for example I’ve attracted my spouse who’s very physical, in the physical realm, and he’s attracted me because I’m in the metaphysical realm.
I believe that our “soul” – as it were – yearns for lessons that will allow it to develop to its highest expression. In order to do this it attracts just the right teachings to us, in the form of our loved ones, our friends and life situations. As the soul needs to grow in these areas, these people or events seem unfamiliar to us — well, quite naturally, as the soul doesn’t possess the lessons they need to teach, just yet. So instead of rejected that which is unfamiliar, we – if we hold this belief system – enter gratitude for the teachings brought to us as we know that we are going to grow from them.
When we see each person and interaction as an impetus to grow and evolve, then we begin to “use” these opportunities for self-reflection and insight. We begin to “take charge” and have ownership of why we have attracted these situations and people into our life and thereby release the delusion that power lies in any other being other than us, ourselves.
When we begin to see life in these ways, we no longer feel like hapless victims in the hands of the other. We no longer feel “done to” or even, betrayed. Instead, we see ourselves as the co-creators that we truly are.
Let’s take the example of a child crying. Many of you may have had an example of your own child crying uncontrollably, leaving you to feel helpless and anxious. You may have taken the crying personally and found yourself getting frustrated and reactive. However, if you were to have this perspective in mind, everything changes. You are now able to see your child’s crying as separate from you. You realize that your co-creation comes in how you react to the crying. In fact, anything you feel is yours and has nothing to do with the reality of your child crying. Obviously every parent would be concerned, but the exact reaction each parent has is idiosyncratic to their past experiences, their belief systems and how they were raised. How we engage with the reality before is the part we play in co-creating it. When we learn to harness our reactions in a conscious way, we are able to design the outcome of our reality. In this way, we create greater mastery over our lives.
When we learn to be awakened to our own co-creation, every moment becomes an opportunity for expansion and enlightenment. We feel endlessly blessed by the many ways life shows us how we need to develop to our highest expression of self. But again, this requires that we be constantly vigilant about our thoughts, feelings and reactions. We need to always be aware of the choices we make, asking ourselves constantly: how can I turn this moment before me into a lesson for growth and greater awareness? rise with this moment?
Developing a moment-to-moment awareness is the first step of living an awakened life.
I have observed a vast difference between those that live an awakened life and those that do not. Those that do live lives infused with purpose and meaning. They feel as if they are constantly learning and that everything in their life has a rich purpose.
It is in this way of living that the most horrendous thunder storm can be seen as a lesson in courage, the longest temper tantrum by a two-year old as a lesson in patience and the rejection by a best friend as a lesson in boundaries. All potentially angst-producing moments are turned on their head, now delivering grace, wisdom and transformation.
If we do not understand and embrace our own co-creative powers, we will not be able to consciously manifest anything in our lives. We will be directionless and moorless, forever deluded to believe that things and events happen to us. When we adopt this way, however, we become astute conductors of our own life symphonies, forever aware of how our reactions have the power to dig us deeper into marsh pits or send us flying high in the sky.
On page 52 in my book: The Awakened Family, I write: Awareness requires us to hold a dual face, one facing inward and one facing outward. Most of us are raised only with the latter, so that our focus is on doing, doing, doing. This book, my book: The Awakened Family, is about infusing our doing with the grace and wisdom of being. We need both elements of life, both the doing and the being.
Awareness behind the behavior is key. You need to be aware of your behavior, your energy, your presence, and the more aware you become, the more you catch your discrepancies. The other day I noticed I was gritting my teeth, so the physical is a great wake up call to how you’re feeling. Your chest beats fast, the jaw gets tight. I asked myself, “Why is my jaw so tight?” Our body always carries wise messages for us, even before our minds are consciously aware of what we are experiencing.
Many spiritual teachers talk about listening to the messages of the body and to listen means we have to be deeply connected as if it was a teacher who was charging you a thousand dollars an hour. That’s how powerful your body is as a teacher, but you and I are wasting the lessons, the teaching is right here!
When I tapped into what my jaw was trying to tell me, I discovered that I was holding on to something from hours before and then as I went deeper, I noticed my stomach was tight too, I was not even conscious of it, and then I accepted that I had been unsettled from a few hours before, and it was asking me to pay attention. The moment I sat with it and paid attention to it, – didn’t annihilate it, didn’t intellectualize it, didn’t mitigate it, didn’t deny it, didn’t hate it, didn’t whitewash it, – the awareness of why it was there came unto me and then of course I said, “What does it mean for me? Am I acting out of abundance?” Soon I discovered the source and once this was clear to me, I was able to gently let go of that which I was afraid of.
The path to conscious parenting is a lived experience uncovered by a willing and committed curiosity. You have to have an undying and unending, unmitigating willingness and curiosity to engage in an awakened life.
Having children is our opportunity to watch ourselves like never before as they provide us with the perfect mirror to do so. It is in this way that our children are our gurus, teaching us to become aware of ourselves like few others can.